Being Brave When You're Afraid
We live, we learn, we keep going
Above: Day Two on the PCT
“Bran thought about it. ‘Can a man still be brave if he’s afraid?’
‘That is the only time a man can be brave,’ his father told him.”
-George R.R. Martin
Sometimes we do brave things by choice, and sometimes we are brave because we have to be. This past week I found myself being brave for all kinds of reasons:
Working up the nerve to ask for something I want, rather than waiting to be asked
Undergoing a short-but-distressing procedure for a medical screening
Standing in front of a judge to ask for protection (and receiving it!)
Running a race and daring to run the fastest I have for nine+ miles in probably six years!
Obviously some of these instance are more serious than others. Safety and well-being kind of fall into that need-to-be-brave bucket. I hesitate to even vaguely these things because they’re personal, but I hope it can be encouraging to anyone, especially any women reading, that might need that extra nudge to advocate for themselves.
As for asking for what I want, and pushing myself physically, I think those things come from a place of never wanting to just settle in my comfort zone. I want to live my life to the fullest and be the best version of myself and athlete that I can be.
I think it’s the foundational reason I love taking on multi-day FKT adventures.
On Monday I began sharing the raw footage of my Pacific Crest Trail FKT Attempt, daily vlog style, on my YouTube channel. This is actually my first time watching the videos back myself, aside from the excerpts Anna Brannon edited and compiled for the official film about my hike.
It’s helpful to watch, because if I go purely off of my own memory, it’s easy to harp on myself and wonder why I couldn’t have done better. For instance, I hate that I spent literally 6.5 hours at my first resupply stop, Paradise Valley Cafe (that episode will come out tomorrow). How could I have wasted so much time? But then watching back, I’m thinking golly, no wonder I stopped. It was in the peak heat of a 95 degree day in the desert, and I was showing signs of heat exhaustion. We make the best decisions we can, and in a self-supported effort, no one’s going to watch out for your safety except you.
But also as I watch back, there are parts where I’m thinking, “Wow, I actually did that!” A 22 hour push the third day, a 21 hour push the 5th day. It makes me feel really excited and hopeful for new challenges and goals ahead. I learned so much on the PCT and can’t wait to apply that to my next big goals this summer… which I’m excited to share about soon!
Before this summer though, I have a bone to pick with the road marathon. I’ve been training hard this spring with the help of my coach Mario Fraioli. I want to qualify for the 2027 Boston Marathon by a big margin (to ensure that I can get in, as the race sells out and prioritizes the fastest runners). I think I can do it. I’ll be racing the Jersey City Marathon on April 19th, just eleven days away. The countdown begins!
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‘Til next week! ~Liz